Bringer of Insight

Descend into fire
Can you feel it? Denial
Help another - some liar
Is talking shit again

Bringer of  'the answer'
So damn hard to believe
If I told you once before
You still would not conceive

Thr rising of the soil
Where chance invades
To stronger solutions
In the down of the days
There where you prepare
For unconcious war
Tied in confusions
Not knowing where to store...

Bending the lines, capable handouts
Bonded in pressure, beneath the fall-out

The flame burns you
A scent of greatness follows
In footsteps of failure
Hang or choke your martyr
And dedicate it!

Dancing on the quiet planes
As if there's nothing to dare
Aroused and deranged
An uncalled for message
Hellfire stings,
Unpurpose you bring
Your passion to light
Ripped from the inside
Clearer than day
See no more insight

Turn to dust!
As I must, make the surface clear
Mind the words I spoke
It serves you right
To be buried under will
Walk the mile on your own

Written 05-04-2002 + 10-10-2002

Crossing the Shame

In so many words
You described my life so well
And send me towards
A bitterness to dwell
I've got something for you
A puzzle; my open mind
It leaves you frozen
It's hard to tell, but I'm broken

If I cannot change...
In all these years you taught me so well
I am now myself,
A hardcase inbetween

To hide, I can't seek
The endless trail
Before that lousy sleep
Can't get no rest
The dawn sets, I'm already awake
In times of pressure
Can't help but feel
A depraved procession

Proudly myself
A hardcase inbetween
Crossing that shame

Amidst the few,
They lack themselves
Weren't meant to make closure for future's sake
To twist the knife they hold so deep
Can't keep running from self deceit

Written 17-04-2002 + 19-10-2002

Ardent Spirits

I lie in conspiracy
And you hold it against me
The intrusion of a downer
Mystical and intensified
Long and wide, this night
The truth forlorn as I
An ever wielding sorrow
A gap; foretell no tomorrow

Damned, drunk and whine
Serpent whore, infertile
Long gone the notion to quit
Free with ardent spirits

This way for those who seek
Might end up in eternal sleep
Lost, used, tempted
This life, not pure, it's for me

As paths I've rode
Widen and hold
Then thoughts of once
Die in unbearable cold

An ever wielding sorrow
A gap; foretell no tomorrow
Wish it could be forever, this night
Unpure, forlorn as I

Written 05-08-2002

With the Rest, Die On

Fuck the means...
Drink the juice from my bile!
I care not for your sympathies
Die, go, just plain out of my face

Dirt, the stench of soil
The last time I got picked on
They burst, choked in reverse
Die on with the rest

Contaminated; a perverse plague
I'm shot from a distance
And couldn't stand...
But eventually spewed back
Outcasted fucks!

That was my aim
Now time is due
Could cut the throat
But that would appease you
So I give piss!
Done, without any service
Every speck, I owe to myself
I'll build an empire
With these crampy shaking hands

Cease to exist
For there's no future to look forward to
(Beside me)
I said:
Die on with the rest!
Die on with the rest!
Done in distress
Fuck you, the useless

Written 19-02-2003

Cunning Charade

I thought to be in a dream
And damned if I was!
The essence came out bright
Self absorbed with some 'once in a lifetime' scam
It took no guts,
This pre-announced situation;
To linger in a well
Without dinstinctive meaning

An invitation:
A garden that's polluted
With possessed self-burial laughter
The place you wish to walk amongst
To stir the essence a little more

A tragic tune is to be played throughout
Once and for all!
I saw it would come to this
But rearrangements can be made
As I will do with this charade...

Written 18-02-2003

Matter of No Concern

These were to be his last hours,
He said to himself
Of magnificence he'll gain no triumph
To conjure up some personal favors
He dreamt about
As years went by for the worse

He shan't rest for the final score
Sleep will be fullfilled at the end
So much to discover so deep
These are to be his last days

Alone he went
And far gone he is
Now to ever march onward
The side-effect of a desolate self;
The lock inside himself

Where further man would not tread
There is so little to go back for
That's not to say there's so much ahead
But it's easier now to influence general thinking
Into impurity

Thou art the loneliest soul
Forever to serve a dark matter
Thine eyes pierced with sadness
It's not so much a fase anymore

Written 15-02-2003

Of Darkest Depressions

The creature, that kept creeping
To inflict yet more pain
To his unintent life
It gave not the hope or pride
He'd slain from his side
To believe that the loner he became
Would become all the more wiser
And headed for disencouragement eternally
The cold and bleakness in his heart
Killed all joy and reason

For thee he does not seek;
An unforgiveable eternity
As to bow, but not to break
Splendour, he won't be given

So shall the fear emerge
So shall it eventually take
Only to overcome again
More overwhelming sorrow

Ye seek the darkest depressions
Thus not the enlightenment abound
And further he shall exile
Into 'frowned upon' mystery

So believe that none shall speak
In his passing among the weak
Grace, he won't be given

For the fire burns deep in his eyes
No escape - as he never would
From landscapes wihout view
His stillness will be set aflame
As isolation sets the stage
The man who didn't shed
Leaves to be left,
As one.

Written 14-02-2003

In the Lonely Nightime, Embrace

By night I feel the calm
There's no one here
I can excerpt from any of my creations
For to know, if they can 'read'
For to see, if they can visualize
There would be no need for exaggeration

And I turn into a twisted me...

I should prepare
I may fly as to where I belong
Right here or a million miles ahead or away
But you should know who gives the hand
You should know who then lets go
You're fooled either way
And tricked me to stay

But where to lead us?
Where to take us where all things suffice?
These rapid trick questions
Don't belong in a life or lie that's determined

Thus forget you ever saw
I'll make my mistakes yours
For I truly don't care
What mediocre problem
Wants to assemble to a greater
Yet to still have no power over me

I may say so and I may do so
For there's nothing that binds me
Yet there's still nothing that sets me free
Even towards completion,
Dead end always in sight.

Written 08-02-2003

The Waves Astir (To Call Upon Yourself)

On these grounds unaware
You stare me down
To win my knowing of what I don't see in you;
Lifeless
I predict of no 'good'
People talk of: "One day it'll all come together"
These bastards should know
There's more to existence than the flesh...
I obliterate
Object to every manner that succeeds
For you should know
My lust is not that of the sapiën
I disappeared and somehow wasn't there...

To drift is to move on
So many cowards spread wide
Their useless knowledge
But once proven wrong
I'll be there to point the finger
To cremate your theory!

Of no use, I once said
Only now I realise the thrill
Of the abuse of gliding, downward
But I fear not this closing chapter
Each one points me to new levels
Ever to manifest to a global self
-Yet amongst the creatures-
These grounds nor God
Had any idea what was to be inflicted
A failed attempt for universal sanctuary
But who let it come to this?

With peace, war will be canonized

Written 07-02-2003

Black Poisened Hate

You are torn apart
By a reluctant sadness
Blessed be thy with such a ferocious feeling!
Oh, the joy I feel
When battered to the floor
Pleading not to stop
But to shovel on top some more
The twist gives it's face, clear
The nightly winds I breathe so dear
Lightning strikes every moment...
How could this not be what you want?

Submit to every instinct
Be it joyful or occult
I'll incarnate
To a black poisened hate
And offer you shelter
Under my dark wings

You must reveal to me
For I can help you
Then force you to enjoy my seed!

You have no other passions to unfold
So why not join me
Towards gates of gold
For you, the eye to see
For me, the mind to bare

Submit to every harsch instinct
It is joyful and occult
Through black poisened hate
I'll incarnate
But believe, my sweet
I'll be long gone before you notice
These things around me tend to swirl
Embitter the sight that is already foul
To me, the image is eternal
To you? Well you never quite knew me...
Some things are to be left alone
As am I

Blackend is my way!
Poisened are my heart and mind!
Hate shall quiver!
And boil my entity in woe

Written 31-01-2003